On 2 previous posts, we discussed how a coach can use the DiSC Assessment as a tool for building rapport with clients, and  how to apply this knowledge to improve coaching effectiveness.  Let’s look now at the “S” – “Steadiness”  (Phlegmatic, or the Golden Retriever).

As a coach, and a high “S” on the DiSC profile (“Steady”), you are very interested in people, and a great listener; some may even tell you that you “really get where they are coming from.” Since you value experience, you usually advance in your coaching niche. You are reserved, relaxed and do not exhibit a lot of the high and low emotions that we tend to see in our “D” and “I” personalities.  It is easy for you to “Champion” your client and people gravitate to you because you have a calm and open demeanor. You may need to focus on holding your client accountable and give more than a nudge to them.  Be willing to draw boundaries with clients to avoid allowing them off the hook. And, as an “S” you don’t like surprises so the pre-call coaching form is a must for you.

How do you coach someone who is an “S”?  They will most likely be somewhat resistant to change, so they may need your encouragement to take action at first. Help them to set goals and a clear action plan. And an “S” client values your opinion so be careful when they ask for advice.  Help them understand the importance of getting things done (tasks) while helping them balance relationships and if you can help them see where others will benefit, it is easier for them to take action.  Our “S” clients like harmony and are not comfortable with confrontation and they like structure. Although they don’t like to control others, they do not like to be controlled nor surprised.

In a future post, we will look at the “C” – the  Compliant (Melancholy…the Beaver)

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My last post talked about positive affirmations that you can use in life and how the practice of quoting  scriptures can  affirm positive words and feelings.  This week, I want to write about the power of our own words and the impact on how they can build a person up or tear a person down .

Our self-talk turns words, thoughts and feelings inward and  can either become limiting, self-sabotaging beliefs or empowering and inspiring beliefs . Imagine if you had a best friend who talked to you the way you talk to yourself sometimes.  How long would you keep that friend around?

At some point, most of us have been blessed to experience positive people in our lives who affirmed us and believed in us, even when self doubt crept in or when we were losing sight of a dream.  Maybe it was a high school coach, a  Sunday school teacher, parent, spouse, sibling, or friend.  Do you remember the kind of encouraging words the person used? I remember my 6th grade teacher, Mrs. Anthony. Each time she handed out a test, she would smile at me and say, “Oh I feel you are going to get another A.”   I always studied for her tests because she raised the bar and expanded my vision and I wanted to meet that goal.  And, her words played over and over in my head as I was studying for her tests,  “I am going to get another A.”

One of the nine “IAC Coaching Masteries” is “Perceiving, affirming and expanding the client’s potential“.  When the coach sincerely “demonstrates belief in the client’s potential”, without going over the top or being a Pollyanna, the client is more willing to take actions to step out of their comfort zone, and challenge their self limiting beliefs.  As a coach, you can encourage your client  to pay attention to their self-talk and focus on positive affirmations using words, pictures and feelings to imprint positive self-talk.  It is amazing how a client can begin to see themselves differently when they imprint these new pathways in the brain over a period of time.   A shift begins to take place, and as their confidence grows, the client is more motivated to take action and accomplish more.   Speak encouraging, affirming words into their life and make a request for them to adopt a new habit of speaking positive affirmations daily.  One technique your client can use is to write them on  index cards and read them each morning and in the evening.  And, you can help them understand when they catch themselves speaking negative self-talk,  to immediately correct it by saying, “that ‘s not like me anymore”... and immediately change the words into a positive statement.  Parents, think of how you can help your children build a strong self image by guiding them to change their negative self-talk into more positive self talk.

Maybe this is a good time to review the free MP3 recordings of positive affirmations that I posted in my bl0g last week.   Someone asked me to share one of my favorite affirmations…  one of my favorite affirmations is “I am a beloved daughter of the Most High God,  the Creator of the Universe, the Alpha and the Omega.  He lives inside of me. I am known and loved by God and I am highly favored.”

What is your self-talk?  How can you build up yourself and others with your words?  When will you start?

“As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” Proverb 23:7

Let’s face it, we all enjoy being affirmed.  Whether it is in our abilities, our health, our relationships or any number of other areas of our lives.  We enjoy feeling that things are going well.  That’s why choosing to be “positive” is so important.  Now, don’t worry, choosing to be positive is a good thing.  It’s Biblical even, all throughout Scripture there are references to how our thinking affects our actions.

A well known verse Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.”

And we also know that the Bible encourages us that “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8 (NIV)

Quoting Scripture can be a great way to “affirm” yourself and to remember the positive.  Using your favorite verses to help put you in the right perspective is a good place to start.  There are also great quotes that can help you to do so as well, or just things that you remember that you have learned over the years through your Christian walk.

Some of these may include:

I am a child of God. John 1:12

I am God’s masterpiece. Ephesians 2:10

I do not fear because God strengthens me. Isaiah 41:10

I am full with the joy of the Lord. Isaiah 42:10

Through prayer, the peace of God guards my heart & mind. Philippians 4:7

Take some time to write down some affirmations that you can use in your daily life.  Then give it a try and see what they can do for you.

What are some of your favorite affirmations?  Do you feel that using affirmations in your daily life has been a help to you?

Click here to listen to an audio of 25 spoken affirmations.

In an earlier blog post, we looked at how a coach can use the DiSC Assessment as a tool for building rapport with clients.  As a coach, it is helpful to understand your profile and how to apply this knowledge to improve your coaching effectiveness.  Let’s look now at the “I” – “Influencer” (Sanguine, or the Otter).

As a coach,  who is an “I” on the DiSC profile (“Influencer), you are very interested in people, more so than the tasks, and find it more natural to talk than to listen. You are naturally intuitive and empathic with others.  You really do “feel” where they are coming from, and since you are highly creative, you will have to remember to hold back some of your own ideas. Remember, the goal of coaching is to help your clients discover and be creative.  You probably walk and talk fast so be careful with your clients… let them set the pace. Your clients appreciate how much you care about them and the trust usually goes deep. Your clients are more than “clients” to you.

So, how do you coach someone who is an “I”?  They will most likely start strong and may begin to lose their momentum.   They are not task oriented so help them to write down  SMART Goals.  Our Influencers have a lot of ideas and are very creative, so helping them to craft their action plan, accountability and follow through are very important. As their coach, help them to keep the focus and ask them for updates.  The playful, fun loving otter is the animal that best describes the personality of an “I” so keep in mind they are social, want fun in their work, and love to be acknowledged for accomplishments.

In a future post,  we will look at the “S” – the Steadiness personality (Phlegmatic …the Golden Retriever)

Learn more about our DISC Training and Certification Course